![]() Mediation typically does not get much attention. People often think I am a mediTATOR, not a mediATOR. Others have no idea what a mediator does. I have to admit that, even as a law student years ago, I wasn't exactly sure what mediation was all about. Take a look at the December, 2015 cover story of Northern Virginia magazine at http://www.northernvirginiamag.com/how-to-have-a-successful-divorce/. The article is entitled "'Til Divorce Do Us Part". It examines many aspects of how to have a successful divorce. I was really pleased to see that the article praised my work as a mediator and addressed, in pertinent part, the benefits of using mediation. One of my former clients, and a former client of my friends Virginia Colin and Rick Schapira of Colin Family Mediation Group, discussed her experience first with lawyers: "During the two years of negotiations, the situation spun out of control. We didn't think we had a lot to argue about, but the process turned our lives upside down...I was so stressed. I didn't know it could be much more civil." My former client went on to say that she felt much more comfortable with the mediation process and working with Rick and me, two neutral mediators. As a point of clarification, Rick and I both happen to be lawyers but we currently practice as mediators. We do not give legal advice during the mediation process. As a mediator, my top priority is always making sure that I am creating an atmosphere in which the parties feel comfortable and safe in discussing and resolving conflict. My client concluded her story by saying that the collaborative work she and her ex-husband did in mediation has helped them to co-parent more successfully. "Now things are good. We socialize {and} attend our kids' school events. We got a chance to talk and be heard, ask for what was important to us and fight for what we wanted amongst ourselves. I can't say enough about how much we appreciate {our mediators}."
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AuthorEllice Halpern, J.D., is a Virginia Supreme Court certified general and family mediator. Archives
August 2023
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